My Mother's Daughter: Finding Myself in My Family's Fractured Past

Summary

From the journalist and author of Want Me (an NPR Best Book of the Year) comes a “tender, revelatory, and deeply moving” (Amanda Montei, Touched Out) story of family secrets, sisterhood, and the importance of untangling all that we inherit from our mothers.

Tracy Clark-Flory had a sister out there, somewhere. She knew that her mom, Deb, was sent to a home for unwed mothers as a pregnant teenager in the Sixties. After placing her baby for adoption, Deb was committed to a mental institution in her grief. Decades later, she had Tracy, who grew up as an only child longing for her sister. Now, in her thirties and a mother herself, Tracy takes a DNA test in hopes of finding her sister—and she does.

Newly connected with her half-sister Kathy, both daughters start asking questions about the past that their mom, who had died years earlier, could no longer answer. Tracy sets out to make sense of what happened back in 1965. She learns that their mom was pulled into a racist and sexist system designed to turn “bad girls” into proper women and wives. Tracy realizes that her own life has been profoundly shaped by her mom’s past, but she also uncovers a bigger story about patriarchal control, mother-daughter dynamics, and the way that shame keeps us divided—both within ourselves and from each other.

Blending powerful memoir with cultural criticism, My Mother’s Daughter is a moving, intimate tale of traumatic inheritance and intergenerational healing.